So as I have mentioned before my bro in law is getting married in a couple of weeks. We will be going to California to be at the wedding and then do take a short vacation for ourselves before school starts.

Here is the problem...it's a wedding, we need a gift. I generally pick out the gifts for these occasions, usually one of my siblings as the last wedding in his family was in 1998, just a year after we were married. I think our gift to them was just being there, that was hard enough at the time.
With my own siblings I tend to be generous, I am the oldest and I remember how hard it was starting out. We can afford to give a nice gift. Also I don't believe in giving money, my reasoning is that although it helps out in the short run, it not a gift that brings to mind the giver. With my own wedding gifts I remember who gave me what, mostly, but I couldn't tell you who gave us money (sadly).
That being said I looked at the registries and a lot of the stuff has already been bought. There are 2 big items left one of them, a Dyson vacuum cleaner, is something I won't consider. The other is a gas grill which we would have to have someone actually go to the store and buy for us as who wants to pay shipping for something like that.
My mom will be contributing a little money as he has always been especially generous and nice when she has come to stay with us (she usually comes at Christmas and my in laws always buy her gifts). He himself has always given us very nice gifts for holidays/birthdays etc...
So I brought this up to CW he thinks our presence is enough. He doesn't want to buy a gift. He feels like he didn't buy anything for his other brother back in 1998 so why buy something for this one. I feel like we were in a different situation back then and now that we are able to contribute a gift we should and it should be something good.
What have you done or would you do?